"We seldom get into trouble when we speak softly. It is only when we raise our voices that the sparks fly and tiny molehills become great mountains of contention."
As
last year began, we had no idea what we were going to do. We had
decided that we would need to sell our home and reduce our costs, and
we were finally in agreement (I had resisted) that we needed to
downsize, since our youngest child was in her last year of college.
There
were both financial and physical concerns, in a house that, truly,
was bigger than we really needed now, that had three flights of
stairs.
We
were thinking in terms of summer, and the work we would need to do in
order to put it on the market was pretty daunting. I had no idea how
we could make this happen in six or seven months. I didn’t
know how we could do it at all, to tell the truth.
It
became apparent by the end of October 2012 that we weren’t
going to be able to make it until summer. Lengthy unemployment meant
that we would hit the end of our resources sooner than we had hoped.
We had a looming crisis, and no certainty of being able to solve it.
We might simply end up losing everything.
I
had a running thread of silent prayer as I tried to do what I could
to sort and dispose of the contents of the house. (My husband was
the hero; he spent long, weary weeks going through so much more than
I was able to.) I was upstairs, heading for something that I don’t
remember now, asking for guidance and help, when the quiet, clear
voice came. “I desire to use this house to bless another
family now.”
I
stopped in my tracks. “All right…You gave us this
house, after all, and You can tell us that our time in it is done.
How are we going to do this? Where are we supposed to go?”
“I
will take care of you. You don’t need to worry.”
I’ve
tried to learn to not worry when the Lord tells me not to. That has
not been an easy lesson to learn, but I think I finally have it
pretty well; I hope I do, no matter what happens.
And
He did give us the house. I thought of the times, as a child, that
we would make something at school, or draw a picture, and bring it
excitedly to my mother, who would put it up on the fridge. Our
masterpieces would reside there for a respectable period of time, and
then she would say, “This was lovely to have; we’ve
enjoyed it together, and now I think its time is done. Okay if we
take it down now so we can put up something else to enjoy?”
Our
turn was done, and thirty-three years was a long turn. He would take
care of us again, and still. Way
back in our two years in south Seattle, before work brought us to
Tacoma, we had one of those times when things were really tight; and
tithing didn’t always get paid, always with the intention to
make it up next time.
When
the calendar year ended, we were much more behind than we had
realized; we had paid less than half of what we owed the Lord. That
was an unbearable position to be in, and we had to find a way to make
it right.
I
had a modest account set up by my grandfather, which we left alone as
our savings for a down payment on a house someday. It made a little
money each year. We used it to make things right with our tithing
obligation, and were scrupulously careful not to get behind again.
My
husband had an immediate blessing after that, with the ins and outs
of a company car, so we were grateful. We felt a lot better,
regardless of that small windfall, knowing we had done what was
right.
A
new job took us to Tacoma, where housing was less expensive, but we
were always behind the market in terms of our resources and the
requirements of a loan. We had a contract sale lined up on a small
home, only for him to be laid off his job on the day we were going to
sign the earnest money agreement. (It was also my birthday, so it
was depressing all the way around.)
It
didn’t look like we were ever going to be able to buy a home,
even after my husband found a new job. But there was a federal
program we had looked into earlier, called the Urban Homestead Act,
which the city had chosen to implement.
The
first time, we made barely too much money for our family size to
qualify. Now we had three children instead of two, and a small cut
in pay. We were accepted. The program provided that houses that
carried a government loan and went into foreclosure would be offered
to contractors for the remainder on the mortgage for ninety days. If
they didn’t sell, they were turned over to the participating
city.
The
city then chose recipients who had to bring the homes up to code and
live in them for three years before getting title. If you had to
leave them earlier than that, you were just paying rent. If you
could prove that you were creditworthy but without the income to
qualify for a loan in the prevailing market, you could make the list.
Houses
were given for the cost of repairs, which they loaned you, and
assessed by family size and number of bedrooms, period. It didn’t
matter what the square footage was, or whether you were okay with a
smaller space. If their formula said four bedrooms, you couldn’t
plead for eligibility for a three-bedroom home.
That
year, there were only three homes available — two with three
bedrooms, and one five-bedroom Victorian. We were listed for the
drawing of a three-bedroom home. One was small, no basement, a
single story. The other was what is called an American Foursquare —
a square box with a pyramid roof and a front dormer. It had two full
stories, a basement, and a walk-up attic.
We
were to list first, second, and third choices. (Some years there had
been a good number of houses.) A date was set for a drawing.
I
took the kids down to the city offices on the appointed day, and we
sat and waited anxiously. The chosen official put all the qualifying
names for three-bedroom homes in a coffee can, shook them around, and
pulled out and read a name. Our name. We got our first choice of
properties.
Our first-choice house
We
showed up at the office, and I told my husband, “We got the
house.” He looked up from his papers, astonished. “The
Ridgewood house. We got the big one; we were the first name pulled
out, and we got our first choice.”
“We
did?”
“Yes!
We really did.”
We
had multiple walk-throughs with the person in charge of the program.
There was a time limit on the repairs, and we had no choice of
contractor; the city simply put the listing up for bids.
As
I remember, there were something like forty-eight separate work
orders. The house had been vacant for two years, but there had been
squatters who had set a small fire in the master bedroom, presumably
for warmth. It was built in 1914, and needed rewiring and lots of
other things, but many of the other houses over the years of the
program had been in worse shape.
We
had to pick paint colors, and after various rental apartments with
plain white walls and moss green shag carpets, we indulged in colors
that wouldn’t raise an eyebrow now, but certainly did then. We
had an allowance for carpet, vinyl, and kitchen appliances. We
bought a real dining room table, and a washer and dryer.
We
had, and still have, a firm conviction that our home was a blessing
because of our sacrifice of our down payment savings to make good on
our tithing. Over several years of this housing rehab program, more
than ten percent of the houses went to members of the Church, as far
as we could identify. The Lord put the program to good use to bless
faithful families.
We
had no question that the Lord gave us the house. We raised our
family there. Those three children became six; as our family grew,
we looked at selling, and instead, twice, we remodeled and finished
space in the attic and basement.
If
it was time to pass it along now, then that was all right. I still
had no idea what we were going to do, or where we would go, but it
would be all right. And it was, as His hand provided for us and set
us up where we are now. His gifts continue.
Marian J. Stoddard was born in Washington, D.C., and grew up in its Maryland suburbs. Her
father grew up in Carson City, Nevada, and her mother in Salt Lake City, so she was always
partly a Westerner at heart, and she ended up raising her family in Washington State. Her family
took road trips all over the United States and Canada, so there were lots of adventures.
The adventures of music, literature, and art were also valued and pursued. Playing tourist always
included the local museums as well as historical sites and places of natural beauty. Discussions
at home, around the dinner table or working in the kitchen, could cover politics, philosophy, or
poetry, with the perspective of the gospel underlying all. Words and ideas, and testimony and
service, were the family currency.
Marian graduated from Winston Churchill High School in Potomac, Maryland, and attended the
University of Utah as the recipient of the Ralph Hardy Memorial Scholarship, where she was
graduated with honors, receiving a B.A. in English. She also met the love of her life, a law
student, three weeks after her arrival; she jokes that she had to marry him because her mother
always wanted a tenor in the family. (She sings second soprano.) They were married two years
later and have six children and six grandchildren (so far). She treasures her family, her friends,
and her opportunities to serve.
Visit Marian at her blog, greaterthansparrows. You can contact her at
bloggermarian@gmail.com.
Marian and her husband live in Tacoma, Washington. Together they teach those who are
preparing to go to the temple for the first time, and she also teaches a Stake Relief Society
Institute class.