Marriage
in both the New and Old Testaments is a metaphor for the relationship
we should have with God. His love for us is like the love of a
perfect groom for his bride. The requirement for loyalty and fidelity
on our part is also similar to the expectations expressed in marriage
vows. Marriage, after all, is a covenant relationship, a
two-way covenant.
In entering into that covenant, one accepts certain limitations and
exclusions in life, promising sacrifice, service, and complete
loyalty. With the covenant comes great blessings and promises.
Latter-day
Saints believe that when God gave Eve to Adam as his wife in the
Garden of Eden, nothing was said about this being a temporary
arrangement. We don’t believe that marriage in God’s eyes
is intended to last for just a few weeks or years. The marriage
covenant from God, as we understand it, does not come with the words
“till inconvenience do you part” or with those more
frequently expressed but still tragic words, “till death do you
part.” We believe that marriage can be forever.
Yes,
of course we’ve heard the verse about how marriage does not
occur in heaven. There is also no baptism in heaven. These ordinances
are earthly ordinances that must occur here, but both, when properly
done and with the right authority, can bring lasting eternal
blessings. Heaven is not a place for dating. It’s not a place
for people changing their affiliation in faith or in marriage.
The
ordinances of change, both marriage and baptism, are both ordinances
of sealing what should be a permanent relationship and must take
place before one can really move forward in the glories of eternity.
Thank goodness, by the way, for the blessings of the restored temple
where mortals can perform baptism
for the dead
and other ordinances to eventually give all mankind the fair
opportunity to hear and accept the Gospel of Jesus Christ.
Those
who have experienced marriage long enough may come to know of its
delicacy. The love between even a very good man and a very good woman
is delicate and requires nourishment, care, diligence, and ongoing
sacrifice. Now that I’ve explained the LDS perspective on
marriage as an eternal blessing, can you imagine the disservice an
LDS leader could do if he twisted LDS doctrine to offer horrific
counsel such as this:
Well,
young couple, now you are married, married with God’s power,
and since what God does lasts forever, we know that marriage lasts
forever, and so there’s nothing to worry about. No need to do
anything, to exert any effort. No need to sacrifice or make any big
changes in your life. Oh, sure, the changes will come naturally since
you love each other, but there’s no sense trying to change
anything about what you do, what you want, how you spend your time or
money, etc. God has done all the work that needs to be done in
marrying you and nothing can change that. Once married, always
married, you know. Now enjoy!
Returning
to marriage as a metaphor for our relationship with God, the writers
of the Bible understood that our covenant relationship with God, like
marriage, requires loyalty and effort on our part. It requires
obedience and endurance to the end. Those in the covenant
relationship can fall from grace. The Bible teaches that plainly and
explicitly. The covenant relationship with God, not just in the Old
Testament but also in the New, requires our obedience and faithful
following of God. How tragic that some teachers and pastors would in
essence give advice about God that is potentially just as harmful as
that hypothetical bad marriage advice.
One
of the exciting things about the LDS religion is the restoration of
the ancient principle of covenants, even down to the level of
detailed aspects of ancient biblical covenant patterns being restored
beautifully (e.g., in the temple and in King Benjamin’s speech
in the Book of Mormon), patterns that were only recognized by
scholars in the past century (see discussion of the covenant
formulary on my
LDSFAQ page about the LDS temple).
Marriage, baptism, the temple, and a knowledge of the real covenant
relationship between God and man are all part of this beautiful
picture.
Marriage
is delicate and so is our relationship to God. Just as Paul urged us
to “work out your salvation with fear and trembling”
(Phil. 2:12), I would recommend that all you married couples work out
your marriage with fear and trembling (and kindness and patience to
boot) because we can fall if we are neglectful. Love can be lost.
Trust can be lost. Grace can be lost.
He
that endures to the end, the same shall be saved. The covenant
relationship of marriage likewise demands that we endure and stay
faithful to the end. Then we’ll see that there isn’t
really an end, but a glorious continuation.
Jeff Lindsay has been defending the Church on the Internet since 1994, when he launched his
LDSFAQ website under JeffLindsay.com. He has also long been blogging about LDS matters on
the blog Mormanity (mormanity.blogspot.com). Jeff is a longtime resident of Appleton,
Wisconsin, who recently moved to Shanghai, China, with his wife, Kendra.
He works for an Asian corporation as head of intellectual property. Jeff and Kendra are the parents of 4 boys, 3 married and the the youngest on a mission.
He is a former innovation and IP consultant, a former professor, and former Corporate Patent
Strategist and Senior Research Fellow for a multinational corporation.
Jeff Lindsay, Cheryl Perkins and Mukund Karanjikar are authors of the book Conquering
Innovation Fatigue (John Wiley & Sons, 2009).
Jeff has a Ph.D. in Chemical Engineering from Brigham Young University and is a registered US
patent agent. He has more than 100 granted US patents and is author of numerous publications.
Jeff's hobbies include photography, amateur magic, writing, and Mandarin Chinese.