With the LDS Church’s
The Family: A Proclamation to the World marking 20 years in
September, it’s appropriate to highlight a book that supports
“turning the heart of the fathers to the children” and
vice versa.
“Family values
(and family value) ... are the truest and most time-tested way to
live, the single constant requirement of a safe and stable society,
and the key underpinning of real happiness.”
So assert Richard and
Linda Eyre, who’ve built a career around helping families
succeed and children thrive, in their latest book The Turning:
Why the State of the Family Matters, and What the World Can Do About
It (Familius 2014, 340 pages in softcover, $18.95).
“Nothing is more
responsible for the pain and suffering in the world than the
breakdown of families,” they write in the introduction.
Likewise, “nothing can heal and renew the world like the
revaluing of families; and there is not nearly enough focus on how
dramatically the state of families affects the state of society.”
In Part One, the
authors lay out the somewhat discouraging facts about the
deterioration of the family, including indicators and causes.
Statistics, surveys, and studies back up conclusions drawn from their
own experience and observations. (As parents of nine and grandparents
of 26, they have some, many of which they will share at the 2015
World Congress on Families in Salt Lake City the end of October.)
More and more, they
say, large institutions have taken over the role of parents and
families, and not with positive result. “The challenges that
our culture faces are preventable and curable only if family,
the smallest of organizations, is revived and supported. Family is
the cornerstone and crux of all stable societies.”
Before launching into
specific how-to’s in the second part, the authors declare, “We
are not powerless in this war. There are ways that we can fight back,
both in the micro of our homes and in the macro of forming coalitions
to influence large institutions to change their tunes and change
their policies and actions and messages with regard to the families
of their employees and the families of their customers.”
It starts with
celebrating the concept and creation of marriage and families:
“Millennials need to see more of the positive and joyful
aspects of family, and less of the scary and expensive ones. They
need to see and appreciate more good reasons for having families ...
and see more people celebrating commitment and popularizing
parenting.”
An excellent chapter,
“The Cure: Making Your Own Family Culture Stronger than All
Competing Cultures,” discusses seven strategies: personally
recommitting to the priority of marriage and family; teaching and
living by correct principles; reinventing time management and balance
with emphasis on spouse and children; understanding selective use of
larger institutions (media, government, business); making [verbal]
communication a constant goal; creating identity, security, and
motivation for children; and using “values therapy” to
shift focus “away from what is wrong toward the rewards and
fulfillment of what is right.”
In addition to
references, extras in the book include sample coalition letters
urging large institutions to enact family-supportive policies as well
as a list of parent resource books and a discussion guide for
readers’ groups.
Among the many quotable
gems: “People are not better off when they are given maximum
personal freedom to do what they want. They’re better off when
they are enshrouded in commitments that transcend personal choice —
commitments to family, God, craft and country.”
The Eyres believe, with
Winston Churchill, “There is no doubt that it is around family
and home that all the greatest virtues, the most dominating virtues
of humans, are created, strengthened, and maintained.”
They offer not just
food for thought in this book, but tools for positive change.
Laurie
Williams Sowby has been writing since second grade and getting paid
for it since high school. Her byline ("all three names, please")
has appeared on more than 6,000 freelance articles published in
newspapers, magazines, and online.
A
graduate of BYU and a writing instructor at Utah Valley University
for many years, she proudly claims all five children and their
spouses as college grads.
She
and husband, Steve, have served three full-time missions together,
beginning in 2005 in Chile, followed by Washington D.C. South, then
Washington D.C. North, both times as young adult Institute teachers.
They are currently serving in the New York Office of Public and
International Affairs
During
her years of missionary service, Laurie has continued to write about
significant Church events, including the rededication of the Santiago
Temple by President Hinckley and the groundbreaking for the
Philadelphia Temple by President Eyring. She also was a Church
Service Missionary, working as a news editor at Church Magazines,
between full-time missions.
Laurie
has traveled to all 50 states and at least 45 countries (so far).
While home is American Fork, Utah, Lincoln Center and the
Metropolitan Museum of Art have provided a comfortable second home.
Laurie
is currently serving a fourth full-time mission with her husband in
the New York Office of Public and International Affairs. The two
previously served with a branch presidency at the Provo Missionary
Training Center. The oldest of 18 grandchildren have been called to
serve missions in New Hampshire and Brisbane, Australia.