Our gospel is one of
goodness and truth, of eternal principles that allow us to gain more
love and understanding. As followers of Christ, it is required of us
to desire to have compassion, and to act upon that desire. As
much as we want to, sometimes we just don’t know how to help
someone who’s in a pickle, or who is mourning, or who is lost.
The older I get,
though, the simpler the equation becomes: Give what’s needed
most. Find some simple, doable thing, and offer it with compassion.
Here’s what I
need when I’m ill, or depressed, or have gone through a dark
time of trial:
A show of compassion.
Real compassion. The kind of empathy that allows me to feel like the
other person cares that I’m hurting. This kind of
empathy has ears to hear and a heart to feel. When there are no words
that come, it is often a blessing to simply have someone with whom to
cry.
The story of the little
boy who went across the street to spend time with the old neighbor
man is a beautiful example:
The
father watched his young son talk for a moment with the elderly
neighbor who’d just lost his wife of many years. Then the
little one climbed into the old man’s lap and they sat there,
rocking on the porch.
A
bit later, when the small one returned home, the dad was curious as
to what they had talked about.
“Nothing,
daddy. I just helped him cry.”
What a perfect example
of loving compassion! This is a beautiful little one who has
not yet forgotten the ways of heaven, I think.
We never know, unless
we are very close to a family member or friend, what hurt may lurk in
their heart. But One knows. His love is extended and our fervent
prayers are answered. But often, as President Spencer W. Kimball
taught, we are the answer to those prayers by the loving help we
offer.
I am trying to memorize
these beautiful words from President Thomas S. Monson:
There
are many out there who plead and pray for help. There are those who
are discouraged, those who are beset by poor health and challenges of
life which leave them in despair. I’ve always believed in the
truth of the words, ‘God’s sweetest blessings always go
by hands that serve him here below.’ Let us have ready hands,
clean hands, and willing hands, that we may participate in providing
what our Heavenly Father would have others receive from Him.”
(“Priesthood
Power,” Ensign, Nov. 1999, 51.)
I might need to
remember, in addition, to have a heart open enough to feel the tender
feelings of those who need my help. And tears to cry with them.
Vickey Pahnke Taylor is a wife, mom, grandmother, teacher, author, and songwriter. Her
undergraduate study at BYU was musical theater. She has a Masters degree in interpersonal
communications.
A Billboard award-winning songwriter with hundreds of songs to her credit, she uses music as a
teaching tool. But her favorite way to use music has been to sing to her children. You should
hear the family's rousing versions of "Happy Birthday"!
In addition to three solo albums in the LDS market, she co-wrote "Women at the Well" with
Kenneth Cope and "My Beloved Christ: with Randy Kartchner. She is co-writer of the theme
song for Utah's Make-A-Wish foundation, the song for the Special Olympics program, and
EFY's theme song.
She writes for several online magazines and columns, and has authored several books. Her
website, www.goodnessmatters.com, is her way of continuing to grow goodness in the world,
pointing people gently toward Christ and eternal principles of truth.
She has spoken for the Church's various Youth and Family programs for 25 years. She and her
husband Dean have eight children and four grandchildren. She adores being a wife, mom and
grandmother. She loves flowers, brownies, cooking Italian and Southern foods, the ocean, and
laughing every chance she gets.
Vickey was baptized a member of the Church as a teenager in Virginia. She serves as gospel
doctrine teacher in her ward, and Dean serves on their stake high council.
